I don't even know where to begin. It's a fabulous feat that I've broken from myself and became published. I'm happy for that. Ever since that day, I've lost myself and don't know where I begin nor end. I feel lonelier than ever as I connect with fellow writers on the web, which only reminds me how isolated I am from them here in real life.
I've seen and heard too many stories where traditional publishers neglect their poor authors to a point that I've struggled against whether to submit any more of my work to them. But I don't belong to the self-published realm, either. I am stuck in the middle, with no direction but for the whispery voices in my head.
I wonder where I'll end up a few months, years from now and can only hope that as I plow onward in this this crazy storm-tossed ocean, I will rediscover myself.
I wonder how common or uncommon this is for a published author to lose his or herself like this? This is more how I feel:
I've become lost within my self that I no longer feel capable of blogging. I have magic speaking to me to write, but I haven't dared to write a single word, though I have over 5 unborn books vying for my attention. In spite of these smothering emotions, I can't help but feel as a brewing storm waiting to break my torrents into the world when it is time. Crazy, isn't it?
For now, I must find where I belong without ripping apart my other good wing.
Have you been truly inspired to live a dream, but feel lost when you're there?